Friday, August 31, 2012

His First Shit


Fevered speculation broke out among the Whanganui press pack today as rumours circulated that after eighteen years on the inside Stewart Murray Wilson (known as the Beast of Blenheim to the impartial members of the New Zealand media) was about to take his first shit as a free man.

Speculation centered on the colouring and density of the shit in question. With clear lines being drawn between the Fairfax reporters (deep brown, hard and stodgy) and the APN News and Media reporters (brown with a green tinge and a runny mud like consistency).

Mediaworks staff were spotted negotiating with the local sewerage company to try and get exclusive access to the shit, while Mark Sainsbury helicoptered in from Auckland in the hope his considerable charisma and moustache (not to mention his prodigious pooing ability) would secure the first live interview.

A Corrections source confirmed that Wilson had been shitting regularly while in prison (often twice a day) and while the consistency had fluctuated early on, a change to his diet had produced a browner and more solid excrement.

An outraged Michael Laws demanded that Corrections build a separate sewer system as he did not want his shits associating with Wilson's.

Thursday, August 30, 2012

What's been happening of late?


Last night Parliament voted 80-40 in favour of Louisa Wall's The Definition of Marriage Amendment Bill. It was expected to pass easily but the margin of victory was something else.

It still has to go through select committee and then another two votes, however I find it hard to imagine it not passing now. If anything I would expect it to pick up more votes as MPs start to think about whether they wish to be on the right side of history or not. So hurray!

In other news the Dowse Art Museum has been coming under a bit of criticism for having a women's only exhibit. Personally I don't see the big problem. The women in the photographs allowed them to be taken, in the understanding men would not see them. Men are not banned from the Dowse itself, rather they are not allowed in one tiny curtained off area. I can't help but wonder if the person complaining to the Human Rights Commission even wants to see the exhibit or is just miffed that he is excluded.

NZ film maker Summer Burstyn made some insensitive and inflammatory comments on Facebook about the death of the three New Zealand soldiers in Afghanistan. Now I don't agree with their presence in Afghanistan and you can quite easily argue that they lost their lives for no reason. But Summer Burstyn is a complete muppet and while some of the responses to her comments were over the top she was never in any real danger.

I have also just come across a fantastic new show. It's called Bored to Death and has all the hallmarks of a comedy classic. It stars Jason Schwartzman, Zach Galifinakis and Ted Danson. Schwartzman plays a writer who has recently broken up with his girlfriend and begins to pose as a private detective. I call it a new show, however it has already broadcast three seasons in the states. You can catch it on Soho as reruns or download it for viewing when you want.

Finally, tonight MPs will vote on whether to raise the Alcohol purchase age. Let's hope the common sense from last night flows on and they keep it 18.

Monday, August 20, 2012

A vigorous Fourth Estate


The standard of journalism in this country is often of concern. Our major news websites are little more than light entertainment. But all is not yet lost...

It is with a sense of great relief that I discovered journalism.org.nz today. In the words of Bernard Hickey:
Journalism.org.nz is a not-for-profit trust dedicated to supporting and building public interest news, analysis, comment and debate.

We aim to gather a group of supporters able to fund, build and flesh out a community of journalists and the platform they need to report, analyse and publish the news that matters. That means investigative, probing, enterprising and explanatory journalism, rather than celebrity-driven churnalism and PR.

New Zealand needs a strong and vibrant fourth estate that challenges, probes, questions and holds to account those people, institutions and forces that affect the lives of all New Zealanders.
Bloody brilliant!!!

The Right to Die


I have previously been in support of voluntary and legalised euthanasia. However in Saturday's DomPost Sean Plunkett had a piece on a public meeting he chaired recently on the issue.

And one paragraph in particular caught my attention:
If we are happy to have a justice system which allows one guilty person to walk free to minimise the chances of the innocent being convicted, I cannot see how we can condone a system that might kill one unwilling patient so that others might exercise their "right to die".
I had never had it put to me like that before and it has made me consider my previous support for voluntary euthanasia.

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Richard Dawkins vs Bill O'Reilly


Rage Against Paul Ryan


Last week Mitt Romney picked Paul Ryan as his Vice Presidential running mate. Paul Ryan is a colourful character to say the least. But one of the more interesting facts about him is that one of his favourite bands is Rage Against the Machine.

You know Rage Against the Machine, the anti-capitalist, avowedly socialist band who represent everything Paul Ryan stands against. So it seems a bit odd. Rage guitarist Tom Morello certainly thinks so, as he explains in this op-ed for Rolling Stone:
I wonder what Ryan's favorite Rage song is? Is it the one where we condemn the genocide of Native Americans? The one lambasting American imperialism? Our cover of "Fuck the Police"? Or is it the one where we call on the people to seize the means of production? So many excellent choices to jam out to at Young Republican meetings!
Morello also thinks Paul Ryan has a lot of rage, but maybe his rage is directed against other issues and people than Rage Against the Machine's.
Don't mistake me, I clearly see that Ryan has a whole lotta "rage" in him: A rage against women, a rage against immigrants, a rage against workers, a rage against gays, a rage against the poor, a rage against the environment. Basically the only thing he's not raging against is the privileged elite he's groveling in front of for campaign contributions.
This election could be a lot of fun.